Something not quite right.

May 12, 2010 § Leave a comment

On a recent trip to the Reject shop ( I was looking for the best of Rove Dvd ) I noticed that true to the shops name, there was something a little fishy about the products being sold inside. Needless to say I pulled out my camera phone and began taking photos of the strange said items to show you all. It was quite busy in there and yes I did look like a creep from the Today Tonight show getting footage for my important ” undercover report” but it was worth it.

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Home and Away ( stay away ) from Alf anyway

May 10, 2010 § Leave a comment

I recently was made aware that Alf from Home and Away picked up the Gold Logie award mainly due to the fact he has been on TV for nearly the whole duration of my life and is still alive to continue a painfully persistent acting career as well as making the time to erect a real life rape chamber. After repeated out bursts involving his now coined sayings such as” flaming gala/Mongrel/Nosy kids ect” we now know why he is so touchy all the time. Hopefully Justin Beiber will end up in there soon!

God Warrior-Think of those kids

March 22, 2010 § Leave a comment

I think a shotgun belongs in that mouth

I will never complain about my Mums winging or shouting, for nothing can be worse than living with this……Thing!

Bus Driver….1 ticket Please

March 21, 2010 § Leave a comment

No not the type that asks you for your concession card.A Dope dude with dope tunes…..Check check it OR GET OFF THE BUS BEYATCH!

Shit head……The next big thing

December 17, 2009 § Leave a comment

In recent times the electronic music scene has seen an emergence of cool young “musicians” adopting masks while performing ,to cover the fact that they are really just nerdy kids behind a computer screen. With such acts as Daft Punk, Deadmau5 and the Bloody Beetroot’s pioneering the whole face mask thing, it begs the question, Are they really just all the same people posing as different performers to increase revenue bought in at live shows and boost album sales. I think so .This notion isn’t that far fetched. The simple fact is no one is really sure who’s behind the masks and whos even making the music. My theory is a musical super genius has spawned a new wave of super musical robot, capable of turning nobs , clicking auto mix and nodding their heads better than any living human ever could . And whats the next big act about to unleashed on our generation of impressionable youth I hear you ask. “SHIT HEAD”. yes you read correctly “SHIT HEAD”, he will probably be from Paris (all cool electronic artists are from Paris). He will have hits like “I smell Like shit” and ” I cant work today as I have a runny head” He will perform in a massive L .E .D pile of shit with his music featuring heavenly on a Japanese Anime animation entitled “Interstella shitshitshit “(due for release in early 2010) he will also Release one album every decade and when his next one is released it will basically be the last album played backwards with some “one more time’s” thrown in there. Keep Posted for updates but if you smell something kind of funky in a club near your, Remember it might just be someone SHIT HEAD behind the decks!

FAT…no not the PH phat…..FAT

November 17, 2009 § Leave a comment

So I have an eating disorder….. look anorexia is no laughing matter… but no really Im fat, and I love it. Dont you think fat people always look happier than skinny people. really. I want you to imagine the face of some one thats just ran a marathon think about it long and hard. Now imagine the face of a fatty about to eat a pie or some sort of Cadburys product ( Roses spring to mind) . Now tell me who’s the happy one. Plus fat people don’t have to deal with certain problems…….like old age. But I thing I do hate about fat people including my self is the fact they always have to proclaim how much they shouldn’t eat something “no i shouldn’t eat it, I really shouldn’t”

“I fucking know you shouldn’t chubalito” but they always end up eating it any way “ohhh i fell so bad for that ” maybe beacause its because you have diabetes , a chronic case of Coronary artery disease and you haven’t seen you penis that wasn’t in a reflection in the past 5 yrs.

I wish I was from Paris and had a Justice jacket

November 16, 2009 § Leave a comment

Just so I could walk around being “ard” like these guys