August 3, 2010 § Leave a comment
My attempt at a Master Chef voice over. In the Spirit of Alfs rape dungeon. With more to come. Enjoy
June 8, 2010 § Leave a comment
Australia has Master Chef fever, its official, with over 2 million people tuning in every night its not surprising this wunder show is now Australia’s biggest on air cash cow. Network 10 executives have now decided to take the show to whole new level. Combining drug addiction and the relentless struggle to get to the top of that culinary ladder together. Introducing “Master Meth Cook”, where contestants are required to make a batches of ” Backyard Bandito Base ” using nothing more than a few house hold ingredients “thanks mum” . It stands to be a win win scenario for the Chanel 10 network, who recently released a press statement indicating that all product made on the show (after being adjudicated by Sydney’s finest addicts) will be evenly distributed amongst children at local high schools . Matt Preston is all for the new show saying “food is so overrated, now Im a meth head I can see my feet and actually justify wearing these ridiculous neckerchiefs”.
The show is said to air late next never after this “oh so overrated” cocaine fad is over.
June 7, 2010 § Leave a comment
The brains behind some of the most mind bogglingly clever graffiti projects, artist Evan Roth, is spearheading a compelling new software project for people who like to tag in 3d, and you don’t even have to wear those shitty 3D glasses to enjoy the action. Introducing Graffiti Analysis.
Roth and his co-collaborators have developed an open source application that works with iPhones and others to capture the movements of graffiti artists and digitize the motion-rich styles into programming language that can be stored, swapped and recreated. And you can down load it free from their web site.
And to veiw some examples check out http://000000book.com/
So put away those markers and get out a torch, because tagging in 3d is nearly as fun in real life as tagging in real life!
June 1, 2010 § Leave a comment
May 17, 2010 § Leave a comment
I was watching Dr Phil the other day on t.v , it was only after my first bottle of scotch so i can still remember it. I don’t if any of “yall” noticed (see I can do impressions as well). but I dont know if yall have noticed that 99.99 percent of the crowd on the show is female and in and amongst that pack of blood thirsty, moral high horse riding fucks is that lone man in the front row, sitting quietly, thinking “fucking kill me now”. My favorite part of the show is when he brings his own family on. Don’t they just look like a barrel of laughs . Wifey Phil in her pastel yellow business suits, face stretched out from the copious amounts of botox injections she has had in all the wrong places ( I think she needs them in her eyes so she can stay awake while phil talks to her). oh and lets not forget his son, who by the way is the Executive Producer of the show. You remember that kid in school who was always putting up his hand because he knew the answer to every fucking question the teacher threw out. HE WAS THAT KID!. I can remember on one episode when there was a guy,strung out on drugs, had been tricked into coming on the show and at the end of the episode Phil said “now im going to introduce you to my son, he can help you. fastest recipe for a murder suicide I can ever think of think of.
So please Phil , remember not everyone is perfect and either are you or your family so stop acting like you are god when really you are Satan. So may I suggest you polish that big, fat bald head of yours, ask your wife if she can see her reflection in it ,then head butt her in the face hopefully provoking a high heel attack from that army of depraved women you call guests on your show.